These muffins are the bomb. Especially when warm from the oven. A cream cheese centre breaks through the chocolate surface, willing you to bite into its muffiny goodness. Willing you to eat three, maybe four in a row. Rosie Beaucoup used to make these muffins when I was growing up. My mother was famous for her cooking. Still is. My friends always wanted to eat at our place. And my friends were always made to feel welcome. Welcome, that is, to everything but the recipes.
teen movita: Treena wants the recipe for the Chocolate Cheesecake Muffins.
Rosie Beaucoup: Doesn’t she have a swimming pool?
teen movita: Uh… yes?
Rosie Beaucoup: Then, no. She can’t have the recipe.
That’s how it worked. If you had a pool, you didn’t get the recipe. If you were the type to take a guitar out at gatherings and beg people to sing some crappy camp-fire song with you? You didn’t get the recipe. If you were a huge twit? Then, no, obviously, no recipe for you. And for years, I wasn’t really affected. I didn’t have a pool. Guitar-playing-sing-along types? I’d happily punch one of those guys in the throat.
Many people asked for the Chocolate Cheesecake Muffin recipe over the years. Many were denied. But if I asked for a recipe, Rosie B. would happily pass it along. Of course, for years she’d lost hope that I’d ever cook, so I think she figured her secret was safe with me. (Little did she know I’d become the internet cooking maven that I am now.) So about a decade ago, she wrote out the recipe for Chocolate Cheesecake Muffins. And I completely forgot that I had the card tucked into my recipe box.
Fast forward to present day. Now Rosie Beaucoup won’t give me recipes because if she does, 2.0 might not visit her as often. That’s right. She’s luring him with food. And he falls for it every time. “This was always one of movita’s favourites,” she’ll tell him as she passes him a tray of some impossibly good baked treat. “Wow,” he’ll usually exclaim, and then look to me as if to say: why don’t you ever make stuff like this for me? Last year, when I requested my favourite arrowroot square recipe, she gave me only half. Yah. You read right. Half of the recipe. This year, when I requested her cranberry pudding recipe, she refused. And then made two puddings that very afternoon to taunt me.
So, Treena, and all others ever denied a special Rosie Beaucoup recipe, this is for you: Chocolate Cheesecake Muffins. This elusive recipe has thrilled many over the years, and I found it a couple of weeks ago. But there was a flaw. There was no flour listed among the ingredients. No flour? I kept re-reading the recipe card that Rosie B. had copied out for me all those years ago. No flour. No main muffin ingredient to hold the sucker together. Oh, and the addition of milk was listed twice. No flour and half a carton of milk? I don’t think so. And the quantity of cream cheese was doubled – 4 oz of cream cheese is a half package, not a full…
You know what? I think Rosie B. wanted me to fail. She gave me that recipe knowing that an essential ingredient was missing. That other ingredients had been doubled. That’ll teach her, she thought, this recipe will flop. And she’ll be completely dependent on me for Chocolate Cheesecake Muffins forever!
But it didn’t work, Rosie B. I figured the quantities out. I made those muffins for 2.0 last weekend. And he loved them. Who wouldn’t love those warm, cream cheesy chocolate treats? They’re Rosie Beaucoup in muffin form!
. . .
Chocolate Cheesecake Muffins – a top secret recipe from rosie beaucoup, corrected by movita, original source unknown – download
- 1 cup flour
- 1/2 cup sugar
- 3 tablespoons cocoa
- 2 teaspoons baking powder
- 1/2 teaspoon salt
- 1 beaten egg
- 3/4 cup milk
- 1/3 cup oil (I use canola, you could probably swap in some unsweetened applesauce as an oil alternative)
- 4 oz cream cheese, about 1/2 of a Canadian package
- 1/4 cup sugar
Cream together the cream cheese and sugar until light and fluffy. Set aside.
Combine dry ingredients in large bowl. In another bowl mix together beaten egg, oil and milk. Stir wet ingredients into dry ingredients until just moistened. Spoon batter into muffin tins, filling halfway. Add a dollop of filling to each muffin. Top with batter. Bake at 375° for 20 minutes. When cool, dust with icing sugar (optional).