. . .
Dear Haddy,
This evening, I am picking up our wee French nieces, Pumpkin and Turnip, at the airport. Adopamop will be there too. I’m very excited to see our brother, but I’ve NEVER MET TURNIP. And she’s two years old. So, I’m about as excited as any one person can be.
Now, I understand that you are coming to visit soon as well. Because you want to see The Frenchies as much as I do. And we will squeeze them hard and cover them with kisses. But here’s the thing: we aren’t allowed to swear around Pumpkin and Turnip. Also, I’ve been told that we aren’t supposed to talk our kind of French around them. Which is a total bummer, because I’m getting pretty fluent in our kind of French.
So, I made you a palate cleanser. Because… well, because you’ve got potty mouth. And when I’m around you, I get potty mouth, and then 2.0 gets upset. Because he doesn’t swear. It’s not ladylike.
Sorbets are a traditional palate cleanser. Did you know that? You seem pretty smart, so I’ll assume that you did. The French are really into palate cleansers. They believe that they will remove lingering flavours from the mouth. They also think that they will aid with digestion and stuff. I’d like to believe that, but then I remember how hard it was to get proper drugs when I got sick in France. Because they still believe in tonics and shit. Zut alors! I should have said poop.
This lemon sorbet is basically frozen lemonade. Yah. It tastes exactly like frozen lemonade. You’ll notice that there’s a little vodka in there. Don’t get excited. It’s not enough to make you take your top off. It’s supposed to help prevent your sorbet from freezing into a completely impenetrable block of ice. I think you’ll like this sorbet, because it’s quite refreshing, and you’ve been sweating a lot in Toronto lately. So you could eat it, or shove some under your armpits. Also, it’s a little tart. Like you. (Okay, it’s very tart.)
I’d recommend making some of this and eating it as often as possible before you get here. And don’t feel bad that you won’t be at the airport tonight, because there’s always a downside. Like: I’ll be seen driving around in a vehicle with two carseats in the back. Comment gênant!
xox Rough Draft
. . .
Lemon Sorbet - adapted from Martha Stewart Living Magazine, May 1999 - print and make
Yields about 1 quart.
- 1 cup sugar
- 2 1/2 cups water
- 1/2 cup light corn syrup
- 1 cup freshly squeezed lemon juice
- zest from one lemon (optional)
- 1 tablespoon vodka (optional – helps prevent the sorbet from becoming as hard as a rock)
In a medium sized saucepan, combine the sugar, water, and corn syrup, and bring to a boil over medium-high heat. Gently boil for 2 minutes – the sugar will be completely dissolved. Remove from the heat. Transfer to a heat-safe bowl, and then stir in the lemon juice, lemon zest and vodka.
Allow the mixture to cool to room temperature, then chill in the refrigerator for at least eight hours or overnight.
Stir the sorbet mixture well and then process in your ice cream maker, according to manufacturer’s directions. Store in an airtight container in the freezer.
For easy scooping, use an ice cream scoop warmed with hot water and then dried with a dish towel.
Yum! I’m going to make this today!
This looks fucking fantastic.
Aaaaaaand that’s what I’m talkin’ about.
Well said, Movita’s sister. Well said.
HA HA! Best comment ever…
Delicious, Miss Beaucoup. Only you would think of sorbet as a palate cleanser to cure potty mouth. But I guess you can’t swear effectively with your mouth full…
See? movita don’t lie!
Beautiful
I was thinking about making cherry sorbet today. Looks like we’re all on similar pages of sorts.
Once you got those medications in France, weren’t they cheap though? Meds were so affordable, if only you knew where to go (read, not the “pharmacy,” because those shops were just filled with weight-loss pills. Been there, done that).
I didn’t get any medications in France. I had to wait until I got to Heathrow airport to get something – anything – that wasn’t from 1812. But next time I go? I’m going to find some cheap drugs.
(I’m probably on some sort of FBI watch list now.)
Who knew? I can cure my sailor’s mouth with sorbet!
What will it do to my hips?
Sorbet is very good for hips. Have you seen the French? They are kind of gorgeous…
I need a mouthful today.. potty mouth is contagious!! You’re hilarious.. this made my day!! xo
I soooo love this letter
….and sorbet….mmm, looks delicious!
Awesome post. You’re hilarious. I wish I had an ice cream maker.
I got 2.0 an ice cream maker for his birthday. One of those this-is-for-you-but-kinda-for-me gifts. It is awesome. And you can make slushy drinks in it!
Love the post! Hate corn syrup – suggestions for a substitution?
Know what? I hate corn syrup. LOATHE IT. Wish it weren’t on the planet. But you can’t taste it at all in the sorbet. Promise! However, I bet you could just add more sugar – maybe a 1/2 cup? But I haven’t tried it. If you do – let me know!
YUMMERS:)
i don’t know what kind of french you speak but this sorbet is totally speaking to me and it’s telling me that i need to make this, avec tons of vodka.
Oui! Avec le vodka, s’il vous plait!
This sorbet looks delicious. I love that you made it to clean your potty mouth. I don’t think anything is going to clean up my potty mouth, but I’ll give it a try. Good luck and have fun with the little ones.
I like the idea of lemon fresh armpits!
Dear movita,
You’ve managed to make me smile (and even laugh) for the first time today. You’ve even managed to make me leave my flight tracker site for more than a minute! Pumpkin and Turnip have just landed in Montreal. Only a few more hours and they will be with you (and I will maybe, potentially, finally, get some rest). Please show them all sorts of baking tricks and give them tons of hugs with Haddy. And when your brother arrives after more than 15 hours of travel, let him roll around in your sorbet!
We’re on it!
xpx
I’m all over anything that incorporates vodka…
Amusez-vous bien avec les petits! Meme si vous ne pouvier pas dire, “Merde.”
You don’t know how close I was to writing “merde” repeatedly through this post…
I love sorbet, probably more than I love ice cream. This particular sorbet looks perfect… absolutely perfect.
I struggle with a little potty mouth syndrome myself… guess I’ll just have to make this! xx
Your pictures are gorgeous!!!
It’s funny, I never used to curse. I had this like weird moral aversion to cursing and used to use words like fart, instead of the f-word, etc. My friends always made fun of me. I still won’t say the s-word, but Nate grew up cursing a ton and I’ve been around him so much that I let the f-word slip out a little too often now
I still can’t type it tho, as you can see. hehe.
2.0 really doesn’t swear? Like, not even when you eat all of his snack mix? Not even when you get the house all sticky from doing pirouettes while icing your cakes? What about when you go around antiquing all the furniture in the house that isn’t supposed to look, you know, old? And what about the time you ran around Ironwood farm and refused to come home without a sheep? (That happened, right? Tell me that happened.) No cursing, really?
I look forward to hearing what euphemisms he uses when to describe the sensation of giving Haddy a big hug and getting his hands stuck in her lemony armpits this evening.
All those years my mother was washing our mouth’s out with soap, and we could have just been eating this!? I’m pissed!
delishh! I think i’ll take up cursing just so i can make myself unlimited amounts of sorbet. perfect excuse, and anyone who disagrees with me will just be directed here, to you the expert.
Just so you know, I’ve never heard Haddy swear. Ever. Also, when she glows, she smells like lemon verbena. I love my Hads!
I think you’ve got the wrong Haddy. Seriously. Bad words just fall out of her mouth. Like, all of the time…
I love how you only see the best in me, Whorebag. It’s one of your best qualities.
Aaaaand there’s the proof…
Hi Movita, Based on your delicious lemon sorbet photos, we’d like to invite you to submit your food photos on a food photography site called http://www.foodporn.net so our readers can enjoy your creations.
It is absolutely free and fun to make others hungry!
Thanks
Zoot alors! I mean shoot! That is the prettiest most perfect way I’ve ever seen to clean out a potty mouth! This is a must try! (and you Ms Beaucoup are pure sunshine! xox)
movita, your sister just vocalized in her comment my exact feelings regarding this lemon sorbet. i may make this. and by “may,” i mean i will make this like, the minute i get back home. because i hear it’s hot there. so i’ll make a double batch and shove some in my armpits, too.
hope your having the best time with the Frenchies and your sister. and i hope 2.0 hasn’t been mortally offended by your potty mouths. and that the tiny ones haven’t picked up any new “sayings.” although, if they have, i can give you some good words to cover it up if they happen to exclaim anything vulgar in public. “sandwich!” works well for “damn it!” and “sit” or “knit” works well for…well, you get the idea. “truck” works very well for the obvious. and so on. i have to employ these from time to time.
i’m also, like katherine, flabbergasted at 2.0′s lack of swearing. how does he get along in the world? don’t you sort of have to swear, sometimes? Mr. Table has a potty mouth to rival the best of them, so i’m unfamiliar with this whole concept of “not swearing.” i don’t know how else one appropriately expresses their man-feelings.
I must buy one bushel of lemons and make this for my next door neighbour. Maybe it will cure his potty mouth.
Okay I made a pinkish version of this kinda thing but I still got potty mouth. And bad grammar. Now what?
Looks good lady. I wish you were in Ontario. I’m considering going to a conference in Toronto a week from today and dang it would be so much more fun with you there. We could tear up the place.
I will admit to needing a good cleanse. I’ve been using the f-bomb as if the world might end tomorrow. Once you start, it just snowballs to a giant boulder. And I think I could concede to giving this a go – even with the corn syrup. But if I try a substitute… I’ll let you know.
Beautiful photos.
I love the way you talk to your sister!
This is an excellent recipe, thank you! 
Reblogged this on debsthoughtstoday and commented:
I like the way she talks to her sister. It cracks me. This is a great recipe.
What a beautiful dish, looks so refreshing and lovely photography too!