Guys! I’m guest posting for my pal, Kim, over at Cravings of a Lunatic today!

I bet when Kim read my post she was thinkin’: this scampi happening. But that’s what happens when you hand control of your blog over to salmon else. Should I have scaled back on the fish puns? Probably. But I can keep this sort of thing up for a whale…

You can find my recipe for lobster pasta salad over at Cravings of a Lunatic, or at the bottom of this post. It’s a great make-ahead option for kitchen parties and ceilidhs. The lemon, dill and sour cream add a little tartness to the dressing, which is balanced by the sweetness of the lobster and corn. It isn’t overly dressed or dripping with mayonnaise, and it’s super easy to throw together.

So, meet me over at Kim’s. Bonus: you’ll get to sea some photos of Kim in fishing mode. It’s a great oppor-tuna-ty.

. . .

Lobster Pasta Salad

print and make

Yields enough to serve 4-6 as a main, more as a side.

• 1 pound fusilli (or other small pasta)
• 1/2 cup light sour cream
• 1/3 cup olive oil
• 1/3 cup freshly squeezed lemon juice
• 3 tablespoons mayonnaise
• 2 tablespoons finely chopped fresh dill
• 2 large garlic cloves, minced
• 1 teaspoon ground black pepper
• 1/8 teaspoon mustard powder
• 1/8 teaspoon salt
• 2 cups cooked, chopped lobster meat
• 1 cup corn kernels
• 1 cup diced tomato
• 1 small bunch green onion, chopped (approximately 1/3 cup)

Mise en place – start by getting organized. Read through the entire recipe before beginning. Measure out all of your ingredients. 

Happy birthday, Isa! I hope you’re having a marvellous day. I’m not even going to whine about the frigid temperatures and snow we’ve got here. I’m almost happy that you’re frolicking in the daffodils.

Rosie Beaucoup was kind enough to share your crustless quiche recipe with me, and I made some in your honour. You might have noticed that I made your French treat a little more Canadian unhealthy, as I’m wont to do. I figured you’d appreciate the addition of some Nova Scotian lobster on your special day, and that Adopamop would like the bacon I threw in there. This way, both you and my brother win. Which I know is important to you, since you’re the most competitive human beings on the planet.

Fun fact: what we think of as the classic French quiche actually originated in Germany. Not that it matters. It’s not a competition. Also, the word quiche is derived from the German word for cake: kuchen. So basically, quiche is cake, which sounds better than: egg custard. You probably won’t admit that though, as you’d have to let the Germans win on the whole quiche-is-cake thing, and I know that’s not likely to happen.

Now, given that there are four of you in your house, you could probably cut this birthday kuchen quiche into 8 pieces in order to avoid battles over equal distribution. 12 slices would also work, but I’d avoid a number like 10 if at all possible. Mostly because you’ve birthed two of the most competitive children on the planet. 

As I’m sure you know, this quiche makes a lovely meal or the perfect brunch treat. Crustless quiche is super easy to throw together – even if you’ve got my brother and two kids to keep in line. In my particular version, the succulent lobster is complimented by the salty bacon. The gruyère gets all melty and doesn’t overpower the other flavours in any way. Also, no crust. Who needs it? Not me. Nope. No way.

So, my sweet, French friend, I hope you have a winning day. You deserve it.

And after seeing how you people deal with defeat on Family Game Night, I’d say we’ve all earned it.

. . .

I’ve included two recipes below – one for Isa’s Crustless Quiche which can be treated as a master recipe and adapted with your favourite cheese and add-ins, and my recipe for lobster quiche which is more likely to kill you. (You don’t have to pick a favourite. It’s not a competition.) Though best when devoured fresh from the oven, leftover quiche can be stored in the fridge and gently rewarmed in the microwave.

. . .

Isa’s Crustless Quiche (Master Recipe)

recipe: Isabelle Lecroart

print and make

Yields one 9-inch quiche.

• 3 eggs
• 1 1/2 cups milk
• 3/4 cup all-purpose flour
• pinch salt
• black pepper to taste
• 1 cup cheese of your choice (cheddar, swiss, gruyère, blue cheese)
• 1 to 1 1/2 cups diced vegetables or other add-in of choice (mushrooms, pepper, onion, ham)

Mise en place – begin by getting organized. Read through the entire recipe before beginning. Measure out all of your ingredients. This recipe is endlessly adaptable – use your favourite cheese and add-ins of your choice!

Preheat oven to 350°F. Grease a 9-inch quiche, pie plate or baking pan.

In a large bowl, beat the eggs lightly with a whisk, ensuring that the yolks and whites are well combined. Add the milk and whisk well to combine. Whisk in the salt and pepper, and then the flour (a little at a time), until no lumps remain.

Stir in the cheese, diced vegetables and/or other add-ins.

Pour into prepared pan and bake for 40-45 minutes. The quiche is done when golden on the edges (and slightly golden on top), firm, and the centre is set/not wet. The quiche will rise a little during baking, and the settle a little as it cools.

Allow to cool for about 5 minutes and serve warm.

. . .

Lobster, Bacon and Gruyère Crustless Quiche

print and make

Yields one 9-inch quiche.

• 4 strips bacon
• 1/2 cup diced shallot
• 3 eggs
• 1 1/2 cups milk
• 3/4 cup all-purpose flour
• 1/8 teaspoon salt
• 1/4 teaspoon ground black pepper
• 1 cup grated gruyère
• 1 1/2 cup chopped, cooked lobster

Mise en place – begin by getting organized. Read through the entire recipe before beginning. Measure out all of your ingredients.

Preheat oven to 350°F. Grease a 9-inch quiche, pie plate or baking pan.

Place bacon in a skillet and cook until crisp over medium-low to medium heat. Remove the bacon, and allow drain on paper towel. Once cool enough to handle, dice or crumble the bacon into small pieces and set aside.

Drain the fat from the skillet and then cook the diced shallot in the same pan for 1-2 minutes – to soften slightly.  Remove from pan and set aside.

In a large bowl, beat eggs lightly with whisk, ensuring that the yolks and whites are well combined. Add the milk and whisk well to combine. Whisk in the salt and pepper, and then the flour (a little at a time), until no lumps remain.

Stir in the cheese, lobster, bacon and shallot.

Pour into prepared pan and bake for 40-45 minutes. The quiche is done when golden on the edges (and slightly golden on top), firm, and the centre is set/not wet. The quiche will rise a little during baking, and the settle a little as it cools.

Allow to cool for about 5 minutes and serve warm.

Results from the inaugural Peruser’s Druthers poll are in! Sounds like y’all wanna hear about my almost-relationship with Gérard Depardieu, and I’ve gotta tell you: 2.0 was pretty relieved. But I won’t be telling you that story today. Nope. Because I’ve got a little situation with my left hand which makes typing un-fun. I’m lurching around the interwebs like Frankenstein’s monster on a trampoline. But don’t worry, little lambs, I’m on the mend! 

So, to tide you over (and build a little Depardieu suspense), I thought I’d share one of my most favourite meals with you. This little ditty has been in my repertoire for years and years. I make it for myself when 2.0 travels – because he doesn’t like shrimp – and I made some today because it always makes me feel less beastly.

You can get the recipe on Epicurious. It’s super easy to make, and takes only minutes to throw together. The fennel has a nice crunch (slice it thin), the feta adds a satisfying saltiness, and the shrimp? Well, shrimp is a party for your mouth. This dish ain’t pretty, but it is delicious. I make the recipe almost exactly as written, except I stir the feta and dill in as I’m cooking the shrimp, so the cheese gets a little melty and saucy (rather than using it as a garnish). I usually use frozen shrimp that has been defrosted, peeled, deveined, and de-tailed. (I don’t eat tail.)

Hey, did you know that Gérard Depardieu has been in about 170 movies? Probably not. You don’t know him like I do…

I have two worst-case vacation scenarios in life: Disney World and cruise ships. I mention this because I’m on a break from school this week, and people seem disappointed that I haven’t exercised either of those options to relax. If I were taken hostage by a nefarious street gang, either of those scenarios could be used as a merciless means of torture. Let’s discuss my reasons for avoiding cruise ships. (I believe Disney World is self-explanatory.)

Cruise ships are basically floating hotels. Buildings aren’t supposed to float. And when you are on that floating hotel, you are trapped in the middle of the ocean with tourists and sharks. 

Cruise ship staff will, in all likelihood, shape towels into animals and then leave them on your bed.

Think of the people you see at the grocery store. There’s a good chance that people just like that have slept in your cruise ship bed. I just threw up in my mouth.

Speaking of barf, I’ve heard they hose down the walls when someone comes down with a bad case of the double-headed dragon. Like, with a hose. Do you spray down the walls of your bedroom on a semi-regular basis? I didn’t think so.

Cruise ships are slow. Planes were invented because of this. People who like cruises probably haven’t heard of stuff like the interweb and Netflix, so they don’t know about planes either. Take a plane.

Buffets. Think of the people you see at the grocery store. There’s a good chance people just like that touched your food. I just threw up again.

Pre-assigned tables. Yup, you’ll eating your buffet-style meals with strangers. Tourist strangers. People just like the creeps you see at the grocery store. And that makes it extremely difficult to talk about those people over dinner.

When you are visiting ports, you will be encouraged to go on lame excursions. Guess who will be going with you? The people you had dinner with the previous evening.

The poop. Where does the poop go? I don’t even want to think about it.

The “entertainment”.

Persons overboard. (Happens all the time.)

Sinkings, break downs, groundings, disabling accidents, collisions and fires.

And finally, pirates. I am adorable, and as such, irresistible to pirates. It’s a curse.

If you have been on a cruise, or anywhere with little kids, you have been exposed to germs. You might need a salad to make you feel better. I’m sure you can make a salad, but if you’re weak from a recent vacation, you might enjoy some suggestions like: chop the lettuce into bite-sized pieces so you won’t get dressing and veggie bits all over your jowls. Or: pomegranate seeds are way chic right now. I tested a dressing for you – three times, actually, but then I got bored and abandoned it. So, I guess what I’m saying is that I’m not really giving you a recipe here. I’m on vacation and every part of my brain and body has shut down. However, this is my favourite way to cook chicken lately. I’m really into sweet smoked paprika right now. Chicken cooked this way tastes wicked awesome on top of a salad – especially if you throw some cucumber in there. Magic.

When I head back to school next week I’ll be in the final stretch. Then I spend five weeks working in a real, live bakery. Then? Graduation. And then? I’ve got some big plans.

Guess I’d better eat some salad…

. . .

Cook Your Chicken This Way And Put It On Top Of A Salad – “recipe” generously provided by movita beaucoup – print and make

Yields 2 perfectly seasoned chicken breasts.

• 1 lb. boneless, skinless chicken breasts (about 2 pieces)
• 2 teaspoons olive oil
• 1 teaspoon sweet smoked paprika
• 1/4 teaspoon salt
• 1/8 teaspoon freshly ground black pepper

Preheat a large non-stick skillet over medium heat.

In a small bowl, combine the olive oil, sweet smoked paprika, salt and pepper. Rub the mixture all over the chicken breasts.

Cook the chicken over medium heat, flipping at the midway point. Cooking time will depend on the thickness of your chicken – about 10 minutes per side. Internal temperature should reach 165°F (74°C), juices should run clear.

Let cool for five minutes before slicing and serving over salad.

Or, eat as is.

I’ve been meaning to give you a baking school update, but going to school full time whilst still working part time is a combination that makes you feel like crud. I’m up at about 5 am each morning, and then I’m at school for the day (sweating, crying, etc.). In the afternoon, I head home to do homework/study, or I’m off to work. Saturday is spent at the studio teaching, which means the list of things to accomplish on Sundays is absolutely ridiculous. I’m totally wiped. Chores have been neglected, lists have been made and left untouched. I wear the same four outfits repeatedly, and all involve yoga pants. Our house looks like a biker gang has moved in.

But since it’s been weeks, I will give you a little really long update. I didn’t want you to think I’d been sucked into a 60 quart mixer and maimed by a dough hook. So, here’s how things are going down at school: we work in teams, and we rotate through different stations – or, areas of trauma. When I arrive at school in the morning, I usually feel like barfing. I’m assuming this will go away one day – perhaps the week of graduation. Also, when my chef instructor says, “this is going to be fun,” I know that it will not, in fact, be fun.

Let’s break down the past few weeks, shall we?

Week 5: a crap-load of stuff made with pumpkin. This was the week leading into Canadian Thanksgiving, so there were apple pies and pumpkin pies – a bazillion of ’em – which meant lots of pie crusts. My first attempt at pie crust in the previous week was so pathetic, that it became the standard for worst pie to beat. But it’s also the first time I can remember my chef instructor laughing that hard, so that’s something. Week 5, combined with 4.5 million blog posts about pumpkin-anything on the interwebs, has created such an aversion to pumpkin that the mere sight of it makes me feel like I’m gunna greet my guts.

Week 6: Bakery Outlet. My program runs a bakery outlet on campus to help us get some real-world experience – the products we make in the kitchen are sold in there. Part of our program is business based – we learn about the basics in customer service, marketing, running a bakery, etc. We also take a course in entrepreneurship, so by the time we leave, we will have a business plan in hand. It’s pretty cool. Week 6 was also my first week with a new team. There are three of us (making us the smallest team in the class). We span three generations – our youngest team member is 20, I am 40, and the oldest is 62. My teammates are both dudes. I like to think of myself as the rose between two thorns. I doubt my teammates would agree.

Week 7: European Breads. French baguettes, pain de campagne, pain d’epi, Italian loaves, French loaves, fougasse. Turns out baguettes are not easy to roll – baguettes are bastards. There was another batch of dough turned black, but it wasn’t me this time. And there was a disastrous day – a day when we failed as a team, and completely fell apart. This, invariably, happens. As soon as I feel confident about something at school – anything – it is immediately followed by a colossal failure. On the plus side, there was a food drive victory – thanks in part to you. Some of you even called in cash donations! I was amazed by your generosity, and will be forever grateful. We got some people fed – people who hadn’t been fed in days. In fact, I’m still collecting food – because there are still hungry people, and because when you’ve had a bad day in the kitchen, it’s nice to remember that things could be worse.

Week 8: North American Breads. Whole wheat, raisin, cheese, and kaiser. Kaiser doesn’t sound very North American to me, but I’ve learned to stop questioning these things. This was supposed to be the easy station, because we’ve got the most experience in this area. And for the most part, my team did well. This was the week that I learned that there are “no dumb questions.” And also, “that’s a dumb question, you should know that by now.” So… there was confusion.

Week 9: Quick Breads. Cinnamon rolls, country tea biscuits, morning glory muffins and French apple pies. One of the most dreaded stations in the rotation – and not just because morning glory muffins have raisins and pineapple in ’em. I know what you’re thinking: what’s so hard about muffins and stuff? Well, let me tell you: when you go to baking school, your ability to think for yourself, utilize common sense, and draw on past experience completely leaves your body. You lack confidence, and you start second guessing everything. So, a country tea biscuit could be on fire, and you might find yourself standing beside your chef instructor asking, “do you think that biscuit is done?” But I guess that’s okay because there are no dumb questions. (Unless your question is dumb.)

So, there you have it. An update. And now, some soup. Because soup is basically what I’m living on these days. This chicken soup might be considered a stoup – because there’s lots in it, and it’s quite hearty as a result. There are veggies in there to make you smarter. Chicken to release the serotonin you so desperately need. And it is easily adapted to help you get rid of whatever that bike gang left in your veggie crisper.

This week I hit the final station in our first rotation: cakes. The most feared station of all. Wish me luck…

. . .

Chicken, Veggie and Rice Soup/Stoup – print and make

Serves 6-8 people, depending on serving size.

• 3-4 boneless, skinless chicken breasts, chopped into bite-sized pieces
• 1-2 tablespoons olive oil (for cooking the chicken)
• 2-3 stalks of celery, chopped
• 2 large onions, chopped
• 2-3 large carrots, chopped
• 2 cloves garlic, minced
• 2-3 tomatoes, diced
• 1 medium sized zucchini, chopped
• 2 x 900 ml. boxes (roughly 7.5 cups) sodium reduced chicken broth
• 1 cup white wine
• 1/2 teaspoon ground black pepper
• 1/4 teaspoon red pepper flakes
• 1/2 teaspoon thyme
• 3/4 cup rice
• 1 cup frozen corn
• 1 cup frozen peas
• 1-2 cups frozen cauliflower pieces

NOTES: this recipe adapts easily to fresh or frozen vegetables. Put fresh veggies of your choice in at the beginning of the cooking process (as indicated below), and add any frozen veggies in the last 20-30 minutes of cooking time. This recipe requires a large Dutch oven or soup pot. 

In a large Dutch oven, over medium-high heat, heat the olive oil and begin to cook the chicken pieces. After about 3-4 minutes, add the celery, onions, carrots, garlic, tomatoes and zucchini. Cook until the veggies have softened a little (about 5-7 minutes).

Add the chicken broth, wine, black pepper, red pepper flakes, and thyme. Reduce the heat to low, cover and let simmer for at least an hour.

After at least an hour of simmering, add the rice, frozen corn, peas and cauliflower. Allow to cook for an additional 20-30 minutes – the cooking time will vary depending on the sort of rice you are using. For example, I like to use brown rice, and this takes longer to cook than white rice. Be sure to check the doneness of the rice before serving.