blueberry break cake {crap no. 4}

blueberry break cake | movita beaucoup

I’ve been at the studio this week – rehearsals have started for a ballet we’re producing. When you haven’t used your body properly (or at all) for a few weeks, it means your body will make weird moaning sounds when you try to engage Ballet Mode. Also, when you’ve spent most of August working from home, you get accustomed to the joys of working without human contact. So when people talk to you during rehearsals, you sometimes forget to answer. Or just don’t feel like it.

Working from home this month also means I’ve saved up some more crap to tell you about. Let’s kill this beast.

First, I’d like to say that I’m very tired of Pinterest Envy. Or, more specifically, I’m very tired of people blogging about Pinterest Envy. Quit being nutters. If Pinterest makes you feel like your life sucks donkey balls, stop pinning, bozo. You’re not internetting right.

blueberry break cake | movita beaucoup

Last weekend, 2.0 and I hosted a family barbecue. At 10:45 am he cracked open a beer, turned to me and said, “do you think it’s too early to start vacuuming?” No. I didn’t think it was too early to start vacuuming. At 12:30 pm, with a few empties in hand, he ran into the house and yelled, “I cleaned the barbecue! AND the front tires of the car!!” Things progressed as you might expect after that.

One of my students recently informed me that she intends to scoop my body up from the grave after I die. I’ve come to terms with it, and find it almost reassuring now.

Really long hair creeps me out. Guys With Fancy Lady Hair? Different story.

A tutorial on how to stick mini pom-poms onto balloons showed up in my feedly yesterday. Thanks, internet. I think I’ll post a tutorial on blinking next week.

I read the best comment ever on a Candy Crush tip site last week:

It’s like the chocolate knows what I am thinking and takes out only the candy I need. It is smart!  

I totally want to shake that gamer’s claw.

blueberry break cake | movita beaucoup

Are you wondering about that cake up there? Yah, that’s a moist, blueberry studded cake topped with a sweet, slightly crunchy topping. That cake is a coffee cake. That means you can eat it for breakfast, on a break, or for dessert. It’s very versatile. If you work at home, you can eat this cake all by yourself while you cry over Pinterest and your imperfect life. If you work in an office, you can sit in front of other people, eat this cake all by yourself, and pin stuff from the company computer. There are no losers here.

Do me a favour, okay? Take it up a notch over the long weekend. Just do it.

. . .

Blueberry Break Cake

recipe: adapted from Jill and Sharon Thomas print and bake Makes a 9 x 13 inch pan. For the topping:

  • 2/3 cup packed brown sugar
  • 1/4 cup all-purpose flour
  • 3/4 teaspoon ground cinnamon
  • 1/4 teaspoon ground cardamom
  • 1/2 cup finely chopped walnuts
  • 2 tablespoons butter, melted

For the cake:

  • 2 cups all-purpose flour
  • 2 teaspoons baking powder
  • 3/4 teaspoon salt
  • 1/2 teaspoon ground cinnamon
  • 1/2 teaspoon ground cardamom
  • 1/2 cup butter, room temperature
  • 1 cup granulated sugar
  • 2 eggs, room temperature
  • 1/2 teaspoon vanilla extract
  • 2/3 cup buttermilk, room temperature
  • 2 cups fresh or frozen blueberries

Mise en place – begin by getting organized. Measure out all of your ingredients. Grease and/or line your baking pan. Preheat oven to 350°F. Grease a 9 x 13 inch baking pan. Line with parchment paper if desired. Make the topping by combining the brown sugar, flour, cinnamon, cardamom and walnuts in a bowl. Stir in the butter until blended. The topping should be well combined and will be a little crumbly. Set aside. Whisk together the flour, baking powder, salt, cinnamon and cardamom together in medium sized bowl. Set aside. Beat butter and sugar in the bowl of your stand mixer or with a hand-held electric mixer on medium speed until well blended – about 3-5 minutes. Add eggs and vanilla; beat until blended. Add one third of the flour mixture to the butter mixture, mixing until just until blended. Add half of the buttermilk mixture, beat just until blended. Continue alternating flour mixture and buttermilk until both are incorporated into the batter, scraping down the sides and bottom of the bowl between additions. (The order of the additions will be: dry, wet, dry, wet, dry.) Gently stir in the blueberries by hand, until just combined. Spread batter evenly into the prepared baking pan. Sprinkle the topping evenly over batter. Bake for about 40-45 minutes, rotating the pan after 20 minutes, until golden and a toothpick inserted near centre of cake comes out clean.

36 Responses to blueberry break cake {crap no. 4}

  1. Dana Staves August 29, 2013 at 7:19 pm #

    Yes! When Amanda comes home, and I tell her that I’m making this cake to celebrate the end of my month-long fast from cooking with Internet help, I will also tell her that movita beaucoup told me to take it up a notch, and I intend to LISTEN.
    I totally know what you mean about working from home and it sort of ruining you socially. That’s my daily deal, and usually the only person I speak to is Amanda, when she comes home, and she’s used to my semi-incoherence and quiet spells, so she doesn’t count. But whenever I have a function to go to, and people talk to me, I find myself fumbling through conversation and then I start getting all self-conscious like they’ll think I’m rude or socially inept or on something. So yeah. I feel it. And on September 1, I’m going to be feeling this cake. In my belly.

    • movita beaucoup August 30, 2013 at 7:24 am #

      I’m so glad that we’ve agreed that I’m the boss of you.

      • Dana Staves August 30, 2013 at 10:48 am #

        I’m like a little kitchen puppet.

  2. mellissa @ ibreatheimhungry August 29, 2013 at 7:33 pm #

    Laughed out loud and had to read a couple of these to Mr. Hungry. The pom pom tutorial killed me! Blinking – yer doing it wrong. by Movita Beaucoup. I’ll be waiting for that one! ha ha! Also, it’s obvious the chocolate has reached sentience – Candy Crush world domination is almost complete.
    PS. It’s nice to know you’ve gotten off the couch and back to work. It’s about time… 😉

    • movita beaucoup August 30, 2013 at 7:27 am #

      Thankfully, I have next week off to compensate for three days of physical-ish labour. I’M SO TIRED.

      (Also, I just got Level 100 crushed. Best game ever.)

  3. Rock Salt August 29, 2013 at 7:34 pm #

    Hey, Movita? Movita. Movita. Hey, Movita. Hey.

    You rock my socks.

    Carry on.

  4. Lily @ Life, Love, and Cupcakes August 29, 2013 at 9:57 pm #

    I saw this picture on my Instagram feed and instantly regretted finishing off the blueberries by the handful while standing at the fridge door…I love foods I can reasonably eat for every meal!

    • movita beaucoup August 30, 2013 at 7:37 am #

      But blueberries are SO good by the handful! You shouldn’t be expected to resist their appeal…

  5. Liz August 29, 2013 at 10:02 pm #

    This looks so good I can’t wait to try it. Thank you.

  6. Amy Carota (@ElephantEats) August 29, 2013 at 10:07 pm #

    Do you know I don’t think I’ve ever made a coffee cake…but I so love those crumbles on top of a cake. I’m afraid if I made this I’d eat all the crumbs off the top before anyone else got to it. But then I suppose I could just tell them it was a regular blueberry cake. Pinterest Envy just makes me want to do like 10000 projects.

    • shannon August 30, 2013 at 9:10 am #

      AMY: you’ve never made a coffee cake? What the? you live INSIDE NEW YORK: home of the coffee cake. or is that why….because you live within reach of all the best ones, so no need to make your own. you’re excused. 🙂

      • movita beaucoup August 31, 2013 at 8:16 am #

        It IS kinda sad though. AMY! Make yourself a coffee cake.

  7. gottagetbaked August 30, 2013 at 12:23 am #

    Why are you so gosh darned wise?! I will now worship at the shrine of Movita Beaucoup and every time Pinterest makes me cry from my feelings of inadequacy, I’ll ask myself: “What would Movita Beaucoup do?” Bake a kick ass coffee cake, that’s what, and eat it aaaaaaaall by myself. It’s happening soon.

  8. Juls August 30, 2013 at 2:33 am #

    I never understood pinterest. I tried to get involved, but apart from the fact that I don’t understand why people hoard pictures that aren’t their own (like a public bookmark bar) and, if they are their own, why they don’t use a more adaptable site. Apart from that it really, really annoys me above all comprehension that there can never be symmetry on the boards and the pictures sit together like shitty jigsaw pieces screaming for alignment. It’s the small things in life that annoy me. And the big things. And the letter ‘u’ (seriously. And I have to see ‘u’ every day because it’s IN MY OWN NAME). I think it’s time for coffee; it’s 6.30 in the morning and I’m already having an internet rant.

    • movita beaucoup August 31, 2013 at 8:37 am #

      Okay, I love Pinterest. Mostly beca_se it allows me to bookmark st_ff and then act_ally find it again. Beca_se I’m too lazy to read the words “chocolate cake” in my bookmarks, b_t if it’s in pict_re book form? Done. I completely agree with yo_ on the shitty jigsaw alignment. COME ON! Get organized, Pinterest.

      I’ve never met anyone who hates the letter _.

      It makes me like yo_ more.

  9. shannon August 30, 2013 at 9:12 am #

    Listen: we could talk about how incredible this looks, or i could just tell you that i’m making it this weekend for brunch, because i am, and i just grabbed a notebook to write down what i need from the store today. Thank you. everyone will love me on Sunday.

    • movita beaucoup August 31, 2013 at 8:21 am #

      Yay! This makes me super happy. Mostly because I’m relieved to know that everyone will love you on Sunday.

  10. Jas@AbsolutelyJas August 30, 2013 at 9:43 am #

    I also don’t understand Pinterest, or why anyone would get hung up about it. If you are envious of something (and i’m thinking in the food context here) go and bloody learn how to make it! That cake looks divine, but alas, I am also a serial ‘blueberry by the handful from the fridge eater’ and fresh ones never last long enough to make it into a cake 🙂

  11. Lan | morestomach August 30, 2013 at 10:51 am #

    things i want to tell you that hopefully will not freak you out:
    1. your post came came on my feed last night around bedtime, i saw the pic and was tempted to open to read but decided to wait to read during work hours, with my coffee, cus i’m on a break, you know. what ended up happening is, based on the pic i saw i dreamt about it. i dreamt that i adapted this recipe. so i have to make this happen soon, cus i also want to add “maker of blueberry dreams” to your title.
    2. when i play candy crush sometimes i get overwhelmed by such ANGER that i fantasize meeting the makers of this game and then hurting them with whatever is keeping me from winning my level, once it was smothering them with festering burning chocolate, currently it’s with BOMBS that detonate after 6 moves (in this case, they would have to tell me good joke before i finish counting to 6 or i kick them in the crotch)

    i realize that both these points are kinda weird/odd/scary. sorry about that, i’m distracted this month.

    • movita beaucoup August 31, 2013 at 8:31 am #

      1. I AM the maker of blueberry dreams.
      2. Did you know that Nova Scotia is produces more wild blueberries than any other province in Canada? We’re, like, obsessed with blueberries. (And lobster.)
      3. I’m sort of relieved that you are as passionate about Candy Crush as I am. Some people just don’t get it. Let’s face it, if you aren’t Crushin’ you don’t matter.

  12. Molly August 30, 2013 at 1:28 pm #

    Five days ago I was forced to figure out who Robin Thicke was and five minutes ago I learned what Pinterest envy was and now, even though I *still* have that damn Miley song stuck in my head, that vacuuming line has me giggling, keeping the internet–on balance–very much worth it. I work from home; perhaps I should get out more. At least to buy blueberries.

  13. Choc Chip Uru August 31, 2013 at 2:01 am #

    I regret reading this, I absolutely need to eat this delicious dessert 😀

    Cheers
    CCU

  14. Stacy August 31, 2013 at 4:18 pm #

    Taking it up a notch this weekend. Think what you will!

  15. Maureen | Orgasmic Chef September 1, 2013 at 10:04 am #

    I love blueberries and I love cake. I even drink coffee on occasion so this cake is a win.

    I loved the bit about cracking some coldies and too early to vacuum. I have a man like that myself.

    It’s not a holiday weekend here but it IS Father’s Day so it’s sort of a holiday. I should have made this coffee cake for my father-in-law but he has to wait for blueberry season. I’m a tough daughter-in-law. Bookmarked!

  16. musingmar September 1, 2013 at 6:16 pm #

    What a great-looking cake. I’m partial to coffee cakes, and agree they’ve bee approved (by me) to eat any time of day or night. Sort of like an all-day breakfast at a diner but without the grease. Besides, those blueberries are full of antioxidants, so it’s health food!

  17. Anke September 2, 2013 at 12:20 pm #

    Yours was the first on WordPress’ suggested list of ‘blogs you may like’.
    I did! A lot!
    🙂

  18. themessybakerblog September 3, 2013 at 9:43 am #

    Hmm, cold brews=the execution of household chores by the hubby. I think I’m going to need to test this out on Squirrel. I’ll be needing a slice of this cake for every break I take.

  19. wendy@chezchloe September 3, 2013 at 6:29 pm #

    Hey – where’s the FB comment!
    Or was it a different post?
    Your sarcasm is a god given gift to be shared more than (feel something to rude and to raunchy coming out- so I’ll stop).
    Bless you Movita and your blueberry coffee cake:) x wendy

    • movita beaucoup September 4, 2013 at 6:04 am #

      It was a different post! But thanks for once again proving that hell hath no fury like a movita fan scorned…

  20. natalie @ wee eats September 7, 2013 at 12:44 am #

    Seriously, if the interwebs is doing something to make you feel bad about yourself, just look at ANY OTHER STORY ON THE INTERWEBS and you can feel better about yourself.

    I have a long-standing rule about not being able to date someone whose hair is longer than mine. Granted, this is quite challenging as my hair can be quite long at times. Basically, I don’t think any guy should be able to be mistaken for a woman from behind, ya dig?

    I’ve been needing to blink for awhile and would really appreciate a tutorial. I also need a recipe for how to cook instant ramen, do you think you could help me with that?

    I’m in need of a break, and I think I have a bag of blueberries in the freezer, and it’s not right to eat blueberries after summer has ended, so I think that I will make your cake, and then reward myself by taking a break and eating it…

  21. Averie @ Averie Cooks September 8, 2013 at 8:33 am #

    So much good stuff going on in the cake. The big chunky blueberries. The crumb topping (my Bff)

    And pinterest whining. I do hear some about people wanting more followers. Don’t we all, but who cares, really. I mean, I pin what I love which means – this is getting pinned 🙂

  22. movita beaucoup December 28, 2015 at 10:42 am #

    Comments on this post are now closed as it was published in August 2013. Thanks for stopping by!

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