My sister, Haddy, made an excellent point when we were chatting a while back. She noted that there has been a real departure from storytelling on blogs in recent years. Have you noticed the same? Is blogging dead? A lot of people think so. If blogging is dead, it’s bloggers that killed it. (Virtual baby showers, people. Virtual baby showers.) I know what you’re thinking: uh-oh, she’s leaving again. BUT YOU’RE WRONG! I’m like a lithe cockroach (difficult to kill due to agility and durability). Instead, I’m starting a blogging renaissance! Right now, it’s a one-woman movement to create content that only my mother will want to read. So far, so good.
Related: I’m writing an ebook that only my mother will want to read! It’s a tutorial for how to make a pumpkin carriage cake topper! It even includes how-to videos! This is because so many people have asked for a tutorial that it’s now easier to spend 4 bazillion hours writing a book, photographing the process and shooting videos than it is to come up with new excuses for not doing it. Is there a word for someone who is lazy but also kind of not lazy? Something that indicates my preference for working in pyjamas? Please inform.
Speaking of work:
2.0: I think I have a job for you.
Five minutes later, and I’m still standing there staring at him.
movita: ARE YOU GOING TO TELL ME ABOUT THE JOB?
2.0: Oh, yah! Ryan from work wants you to bake a cake for him.
movita: For his birthday?
2.0: No. A different gender… gender switch cake?
movita: A gender reassignment cake?
2.0: Yah! That’s it!
movita: Wow. I’m not sure how to convey that with cake.
2.0: Oh. You don’t do that sort of thing? I can tell him.
movita: No, no! I’d be honoured to be a part of something so incredible. I had no idea. You’ve never mentioned that Ryan identifies as femal… WAIT. Do you mean gender REVEAL cake?
2.0: No. (pausing) Maybe? What’s that?
movita: That’s when someone’s having a baby, and they want to tell people if they are having a boy or a girl.
2.0: I don’t get it.
movita: Basically, you make a cake that is, say, white on the outside, but pink or blue on the inside, which tells people if you’re having a boy or girl when you cut into it. It’s a big trend right now.
2.0: I’m not sure. I don’t think so.
movita: Is Ryan’s partner having a baby?
movita: Okay, honey. They want a gender reveal cake. That’s very different from gender reassignment. And far easier to capture in buttercream.
(I acknowledge that I made the jump to gender reassignment, not 2.0. My mistake.)
Some of you may have noticed that Pumpkin Carve-Off didn’t happen this year. Honestly, after six months away from blogging, it was hard to get back into the swing of things, and it kinda got away from me. Plus, prizes. They simply weren’t in the budget this year. But Ginger? THAT’S HAPPENING! Start planning your gingerbread creations! Note: due to budgetary restraints, it’s entirely possible that the winner will receive only a scanned photo of me in my prom dress (June 1990).