crap no. 18

crap no. 18 // movita beaucoup

My sister, Haddy, made an excellent point when we were chatting a while back. She noted that there has been a real departure from storytelling on blogs in recent years. Have you noticed the same? Is blogging dead? A lot of people think so. If blogging is dead, it’s bloggers that killed it. (Virtual baby showers, people. Virtual baby showers.) I know what you’re thinking: uh-oh, she’s leaving again. BUT YOU’RE WRONG! I’m like a lithe cockroach (difficult to kill due to agility and durability). Instead, I’m starting a blogging renaissance! Right now, it’s a one-woman movement to create content that only my mother will want to read. So far, so good.

Related: I’m writing an ebook that only my mother will want to read! It’s a tutorial for how to make a pumpkin carriage cake topper! It even includes how-to videos! This is because so many people have asked for a tutorial that it’s now easier to spend 4 bazillion hours writing a book, photographing the process and shooting videos than it is to come up with new excuses for not doing it. Is there a word for someone who is lazy but also kind of not lazy? Something that indicates my preference for working in pyjamas? Please inform.

crap no. 18 // movita beaucoup

Speaking of work:

2.0: I think I have a job for you.

movita: Okay.

Five minutes later, and I’m still standing there staring at him.


2.0: Oh, yah! Ryan from work wants you to bake a cake for him.

movita: For his birthday?

2.0: No. A different gender… gender switch cake?

movita: A gender reassignment cake?

2.0: Yah! That’s it!

movita: Wow. I’m not sure how to convey that with cake.

2.0: Oh. You don’t do that sort of thing? I can tell him.

movita: No, no! I’d be honoured to be a part of something so incredible. I had no idea. You’ve never mentioned that Ryan identifies as femal… WAIT. Do you mean gender REVEAL cake?

2.0: No. (pausing) Maybe? What’s that?

movita: That’s when someone’s having a baby, and they want to tell people if they are having a boy or a girl.

2.0: I don’t get it.

movita: Basically, you make a cake that is, say, white on the outside, but pink or blue on the inside, which tells people if you’re having a boy or girl when you cut into it. It’s a big trend right now.

2.0: I’m not sure. I don’t think so.

movita: Is Ryan’s partner having a baby?

2.0: Yah!

movita: Okay, honey. They want a gender reveal cake. That’s very different from gender reassignment. And far easier to capture in buttercream.

(I acknowledge that I made the jump to gender reassignment, not 2.0. My mistake.)

crap no. 18 // movita beaucoup

Some of you may have noticed that Pumpkin Carve-Off didn’t happen this year. Honestly, after six months away from blogging, it was hard to get back into the swing of things, and it kinda got away from me. Plus, prizes. They simply weren’t in the budget this year. But Ginger? THAT’S HAPPENING! Start planning your gingerbread creations! Note: due to budgetary restraints, it’s entirely possible that the winner will receive only a scanned photo of me in my prom dress (June 1990).


36 Responses to crap no. 18

  1. sublimedelights November 1, 2015 at 11:35 am #

    Oh so glad there is the gingerbread contest! Fun Fun Fun!

    • movita beaucoup November 1, 2015 at 12:01 pm #

      I will eagerly await your sugary entry. (See what I did there? You HAVE to enter now!)

  2. themondaybox November 1, 2015 at 11:44 am #

    I would much rather read the occasional, yet always creative sharing that is Movita Beaucoup content over attending 22 million virtual baby showers. Just so you know, I read your blog because I come away inspired with a smile. Your many creative talents awe me. As for storytelling….My very own sister said to me, “I don’t want to read a blogger’s life story. I want a recipe. I just skip over all of that other stuff.” She has a talent for providing self-doubt. But I gravitate toward blogs that are all about the story. If a recipe comes with the story, that’s icing on the virtual cake. 🙂

    • movita beaucoup November 1, 2015 at 11:58 am #

      It’s interesting, isn’t it? For every person that likes a story, there is someone who just wants the damn recipe! I guess I miss originality as much as good writing. The interweb is so over-saturated with blogs – particularly food blogs – that it is almost deafening. I get so tired of seeing recipe roundups, hashtag-themed posts and national food holidays that I wanna puke. But it would seem that I’m in the minority, as that stuff is thriving online! Still, if I have to go to a baby shower, I’d better get to eat some REAL cake!

      • themondaybox November 1, 2015 at 1:25 pm #

        Most occasions (if not all) are improved with real cake, I think. 🙂 My personal blogging debate centers around determining the purpose and end goals for my blog. Certainly, some of the “go with what sells mentality” is driven by….what sells. Part of the shift in food blogging content boils down to monetization. I suspect there is a big difference in blogging as a creative outlet and blogging for a sustainable income. In trying to eventually do both simultaneously, I work toward balance.

        • movita beaucoup November 1, 2015 at 10:52 pm #

          Now that I’ve decided that trying to monetize this blog is a complete waste of time, I think of it as a) my happy space in the interwebs, and b) my portfolio. A portfolio of what, I’m not sure, but still. I figure if I drop dead tomorrow, I’d like this space to be a part of my legacy. And my legacy ain’t for sale!

    • Lynne Knowlton November 1, 2015 at 3:25 pm #

      Ya know what? @TheMondayBox <<< love that name, so I had to type it again 🙂 ….you just nailed it. I'd rather read a story too, and I love Movi's stories. LOVE. There are a trillion billion gazillion blogs out there .. I know that.. because I have one haha… but I hope the best ones with the best intentions and the bestest stories..rise like bread and become the cream of the crop. Possibly buttercream cream of the crop. Okay, I need to back off the 14 cups of coffee that I had today.

      Lynne 🙂

  3. ibreatheimhungry November 1, 2015 at 12:12 pm #

    I don’t think blogging is dead but I DO think that at least 80% of bloggers are doing a great job of trying to kill it. Pauses to take deep breath….COMMENCE RANT… Ok, my two cents on the primary problem with blogging these days is that over the past couple of years you’ve got people coming out of the woodwork to start blogs (especially food blogs) not because they have passion or it or even something to say or share, but because they want to make money at it and quit their day jobs. If you talk to successful bloggers who are making a good living at it, most of them will tell you they didn’t even know you COULD make money blogging, they just started it because they had a love of food, photography, entertaining, health, storytelling or something they were passionate about. Eventually (usually after several years) if they were good at it they built a following and started earning money. Problem is, now there are thousands of bloggers diluting the community who are just looking around for successful blogs and trying to emulate them exactly in order to try and earn money – but they don’t really have a passion for the craft – they are churning out daily mediocre posts that are pale substitutes for the posts they’ve read that they see go viral in hopes that it will happen for them. In doing so they are making it harder to find the “real” blogs with something to say or otherwise offer. Whether it’s just a recipe or just a story or a combination of both – it should be genuine and unique or at least have your unique spin if it’s something you’ve been inspired by on another site. The only hope for blogging to survive and thrive is that these imposters who are in it solely for the money will burn out when it doesn’t happen and fall off the scene. Fingers crossed. Meanwhile, you are one of the good ones so PLEASE NEVER QUIT AGAIN. That is all.

    • movita beaucoup November 1, 2015 at 12:30 pm #

      You have basically just summed up EVERY EMOTION I HAVE ABOUT BLOGGING RIGHT NOW. (Also, when people tell me they want to start a blog in order to earn money – because it’s that easy – I laugh and laugh and laugh.) I can’t even put the words together to state clearly just how much I agree with your take on the watered down world that is blogging right now. Like, I actually need to rest now. It’s nice to know that I’m blogging for Rosie Beaucoup AND you. That’s a solid fan-base if ever there were one.

      • Lynne Knowlton November 1, 2015 at 3:28 pm #

        …and me…I never miss a blog post of yours…. ’cause I love you like that. Going for a nap now too. This may be the first time I have left 3 comments in one blog post. haha.

        • movita beaucoup November 1, 2015 at 10:30 pm #

          Lynn, thank you for leaving three comments on a single blog post. It will surely make me seem more legit.

          Keep up the good work,
          xox movita

      • Sharon | Cheesy Pennies November 1, 2015 at 10:15 pm #

        Let’s just agree that there are awesome blogs like this one, and that we who love them will celebrate each post by commenting like mad and letting the authors know they are not only appreciated but sincerely celebrated. This will by no means be as lucrative as a cookbook deal (“You guys! I’ve got a secret I’ve been DYING to tell you!!”) or a show on Food Network, but it will hopefully be meaningful enough to keep the crazy funny stories and ballets coming our way. It’s not about the size of your audience (she tells herself daily), but the quality of the lurking few that makes it all worth it. Plus, I now have the idea of gender reassignment cake stuck in my head. Bless you.

        • movita beaucoup November 1, 2015 at 10:28 pm #

          Sharon, you are a quality lurker. Consider changing your gender, and I’ll bake you a cake.

    • Lynne Knowlton November 1, 2015 at 3:27 pm #

      Amen sista. Amen. Drops the mic. Walks off the stage. Best evahhh. You should write a blog post about that ! Dang, you nailed it. Well done!

      Lynne x

      • ibreatheimhungry November 1, 2015 at 5:57 pm #

        Me, Rosie Beaucoup, and Lynne (I’m pageant waving at you from my stage/soapbox Lynne tee hee) have your back girl! Along with hopefully thousands of other people who know a great blog when they find it! There aren’t a lot of blogs that I even keep up with these days but you, Lynne and Shannon are at the top of my short list. Even if I don’t always comment, I NEVER miss a post. Mwah! xo

  4. rockandwool November 1, 2015 at 12:48 pm #

    So glad you popped up in my mailbox again—Whew!
    Can’t get rid of me, after all, I am going to use Super Glue to attach you to my life.

    As for me, my blog is something only my girl in pajamas would read = ME
    because there are no patterns, recipes or magic potions in it.

    your northwestern wind,

    • movita beaucoup November 1, 2015 at 10:29 pm #

      Teri, magic potions are highly overrated. I’ll take you just as you are. xox

  5. Karen @ Karen's Kitchen Stories November 1, 2015 at 12:54 pm #

    Okay, I participated in ONE virtual baby shower. Sheepish grin. It was a long time ago and I’ve reformed.

    • movita beaucoup November 1, 2015 at 1:08 pm #

      Karen, you fill the world with tasty bread. You are forgiven.

      • Teri November 1, 2015 at 2:33 pm #

        Double wow!
        I’ve checked out “Karen@Karenskitchenstories and presently making her Potato pizza::::: such a delicious world we’re in❤️ Thanks

      • Karen @ Karen's Kitchen Stories November 1, 2015 at 4:44 pm #

        Phew!!! And I only used stripy twine around cookies once!

        • movita beaucoup November 1, 2015 at 10:53 pm #

          Karen, I’m quite sure I’ve used RIBBON around cookies on this blog. RIBBON.

          I loathe my past self.

  6. Karen November 1, 2015 at 2:23 pm #

    I’m alway in for the story telling. I learn, laugh and always look forward to what’s next. Though I could never bake cakes like yours, I love looking at your amazing photos of your cakes and wondering if I will ever get to taste one. Blog on!

  7. Jenni Field (@PastryChfOnline) November 1, 2015 at 2:40 pm #

    Please make a gender reassignment cake. Please.

    I participated in a virtual wedding shower, but I actually mailed the cake up to the bride, so I feel like I was sort of there. Or at least the cake was.

    I am looking forward to ginger this year!

    • movita beaucoup November 1, 2015 at 10:25 pm #

      Maybe we can make gender reassignment cakes a thing in 2016?

      I get more excited for Ginger every year. Especially the entries sent in by kids or those sent in by adults that have the skill level of little children. Those are the bestest!

  8. Cyndy November 1, 2015 at 4:32 pm #

    Oh goodie! Gingerbread – so excited for this time of year!

    • movita beaucoup November 1, 2015 at 10:26 pm #

      Enter, Cyndy! ENTER!!

  9. emmalina73 November 1, 2015 at 6:58 pm #

    I couldn’t agree more! I’ve almost stopped reading blogs because they are just forums for product placement and the promotion of a ‘brand’. The sincerity is mostly gone and I find it boring to read. I love your refreshing honesty, humour and diversity; I never know what I’m going to get and I love it!

    I’ve almost stopped writing myself because I catch myself in a loop of worrying about what ‘fits’ or what I ‘should’ be writing about. It’s ridiculous! I write for myself and yet it is such a saturated world that I feel my voice isn’t worth anything at times.

    I think the thing I despise it the commodification of it all. It’s all about ‘driving traffic’ and creating a readership, instead of saying something sincere or fresh. I don’t want to reduce my life to 10 things you should….it feels so utterly pointless.

    All that to say, I love what you do and how you do it. You rule the school, and I have an actual school so I feel comfortable appointing you as a ruler. I shall create the department Cake and you shall run it and we shall laugh every day despite the fact that we cant fit through doors. Oh how we shall laugh. And we will remind each other to take our diabetes medication so extra bonus.

    • movita beaucoup November 1, 2015 at 10:47 pm #

      Emma, the greatest gift I gave myself this year was the freedom to blog just for the fun of it. I rarely check my stats nowadays, and I’ve stopped worrying about what people might or might not like to see here. I LIKE ballet. I LIKE poop. I LIKE cake. And I like writing about whatever strikes my fancy at any given time. I feel so lucky to have a loyal readership that seems unfazed by my short attention span and experimental blogging! More than that, I’m glad to have made friends like you in this little ol’ space. It’s the most wonderful part of the interwebs. (Aside from cat videos.)

      I have missed your blog posts, as I always feel like you’re telling ME a story. Just me. Like when a stalker thinks the dialogue in a film is directed at her personally, and no one else in the darkened theatre. I don’t have kids, a farm, or any motivation to, you know, work, and yet, I adore hearing about your life. It just goes to show that sometimes it’s more interesting to read about a life that is different than your own than one that mimics whatever is currently trending on Instagram.

      I do like the possibility of becoming Head of the Cake department (yes, I promoted myself), and because I don’t have children, I’m hoping you might encourage yours to put me in a home when the time comes. I’ve asked my students to make the call, but they are generally unreliable, and I like to have a backup plan.

  10. Liz Berg November 2, 2015 at 5:46 am #

    Haha, so glad you’re like a cockroach! And I’m relieved you sleuthed out the real cake theme—though I’d love to see what you could come up with for a gender reassignment 🙂

  11. jenneruth November 3, 2015 at 12:31 am #

    I got all riled up reading this, but turns out it was all for nothing since I don’t blog. Whew. I can relax again. Please keep up the funny, Movita! We NEED you! Thanks for blogging like a boss.

  12. Willow | Will Cook For Friends November 10, 2015 at 5:14 pm #

    That conversation with 2.0 had me laughing so hard! Gender reassignment, gender reveal, same thing, right?

    And amen to what Mellissa said in an earlier comment — the whole foodblog scene is bogged down with the influx of new voices, and it is pretty depressing. The whole thing seems to be more about trends than it is about sharing honest, quality content. I remember back when I was first starting blogging, maybe a year into it, feeling this insane amount of pressure to post something for Easter at least a week before the holiday, or St. Patties Day, or all these other things that I hardly even celebrate in real life, and it feeling so fake and dishonest… then I realized… I don’t *have* to do anything. I can write about whatever I want to write about, whenever I feel like writing about it, not when I’m “supposed to”. Again, that was ages ago, but ever since I just remind myself why I started blogging in the first place — not to make money or be famous or be trendy (god knows I am NOT trendy) — but to be honest about food, share my forays in the kitchen, and maybe (hopefully) inspire others to do the same. When I question whether blogging is dying or not, I just push it out of my mind, put my head down, and remind myself why I do what I do… and keep doing.

    Anyway, there are still plenty of blogs I love to read, who are keeping it very much alive, and you are right at the top of that list. Keep doing what you do, lady!

    • movita beaucoup November 15, 2015 at 4:28 pm #

      Willow, I have just read all of your comments – ALL of the comments you left on your recent binge read – and I can’t tell you how happy I am that you are here, and that you are a part of my life thanks to the interwebs. You keep doing too, woman. The www would implode without you.

      • Willow | Will Cook For Friends November 15, 2015 at 9:16 pm #

        Haha, it was a thoroughly enjoyable binge read! And that is the beauty of the interwebs — I feel so fortunate to have “met” you and so many other bloggers through this thoroughly weird thing we do. 🙂

  13. Roger December 1, 2015 at 2:43 pm #

    I am left speechless, a very rare occurrence. As always, love your work. And blogging, I know that it tried to kill us (us being my food blogger wife and somewhat technical me). For my professional pastry chef wife food blogging started as fun, then we got caught up by the likes of Pinch of Baloney Make a Million Blogging and it turned into work. Now it’s pastry blogging as a labor of love where it should have stayed to begin with.

    Hmmmm, turns out I had something to say, maybe it was the baby gender reassignment surgery cake that caused the momentary lack of thought….

    • movita beaucoup December 2, 2015 at 7:18 am #

      Well, we COULD make a million bucks blogging, but we’d also need over 2 million views a month! So, because that seems like a LOT of work, I’ve decided that it’s easier to just lay on my couch eating Doritos. Besides, aren’t we having more fun now? Of course we are, Roger!! Cheers to labor for love!

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